Thursday, March 27, 2014

france 2.0

’’Do you want some coffee honey?’’  ‘‘Yes thank you, black.’’ ’’We need to hurry up, we have a plane to cath. ‘’Can I have this mommy? Please’’ she has Oreos in her hands.
On the plane, they could se the sun, like they where on the same level. I was sitting next to Chanel she’s from France. Her husband is waiting at the airport, she told me it was Nelson Mandela, but who knows. Chanel was reading fifty shades of grey. She had her pillow with her. She ordered ben and jerry’s, and coke. She asked the stewardess for a spoon. We landed safely and in the check out, we saw policemen walking around. They had far to many revolvers. The daughter cried and they went into a little café, at lunchtime they ordered tomatoes and cucumber. She couldn’t eat all of the bread, so they went outside to the birds and feed them. They saw a blackbird a spur and a lark.  They ran to the underground to catch a train to go to the Louvre museum, where they saw the painting Mona Lisa. She fell over a sign; witch said ‘’watch out for slippery floors’’.

1 comment:

  1. The text seems a bit random. We hear some people talking at the start, but we don't have a clue as to who they are. The text also shifts suddenly between thrid person narrative and first person. Who is the "I" sitting next to Chanel? Quite confusing and messy. Chanel actually seems quite interesting, though...

    On the whole, though, it reads like non-fiction, so that is good. The text ends abruptly, though, which is less good.

    The ingredients are used quite well, but sometimes you use a cheap trick such as a list of birds. Not as creative as it could have been. And - you didn't use all the ingredients.


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