Thursday, March 27, 2014

Political speech

Live hopefully.

We American people lives a hopefully life. We think we are safe, when we come home to our house or when we send our children to school, but we forget the reality. We forget that we have a gun problem. We forget that we cannot trust the neighbour with a gun. The School shootings are getting worse, but what do we Americans do? Nothing, we are a proud people, but we must not let our proud be our loss or our end of our proud and well created country. Our ancestors have built this country from the scratch, so I refuse to see our generations, fight with each other. We American people must stand together.    


  1. As a speech this works really well. You have emotional appeal "We American people must stand together"; and you have a rational argument about what needs to be improved to make America better. So, good job in imitating a politician!

    But there are many mistakes in your text: Proud is a verb - the noun is 'pride'. "We American people" - that is in the plural, so the verb 'live' should also be in the plural. "a hopefully life" - there should be an adjective in front of life, not an adverb! Feel free to correct those mistakes in your revision.

  2. And was the backwards phrase 'live hopefully'? You could have integrated it much better by putting it in the punch line: "We Americans must stand together and live hopefully!"


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