funeral
Not was he just the only one. He was also my best
friend and soul made. It is so unreal that Peter is gone. I miss him, and I
know that many of you also do. He would be happy to see you all, but not at
this occasion. He did fight for this country, and he did his best. He lost his
life in the middle of the war. He was a good dad, a perfect man and a loyal
friend. Peter die far too early. We had so many plans, but know……we will have
to save it for another life. Peter, I love you and hope you will rest in peace.
Life is sometime just so unfair, but we will have to deal with it. We do appreciate
all of your helps and sweet words. After this there will be a get-together at
Linda and Kim’s, Peter’s parent’s house, you are all welcome.
I am guessing this is a speech. If so, you can use labels to make sure people understand it correctly, or put the word 'speech' in your title. I have added the label 'speech' so you can see how that is done.
ReplyDelete'Soul made' should have been 'soulmate'...
The backwards phrase (again I am guessing as to what it is): "Not was he" is not very inspiring, and really just sounds awkward. You could try to do a rewrite to integrate it more.
As for the conventions of a speech, I think you did a good job: There is a clear speaker, there is an audience being addressed/talked to, and I like that there is a passage where the dead man is addressed directly. That lifts the emotional level of the speech, which is important for the listener. After all, a funeral speech has the function of cleansing, both for the speaker and the audience...